Chocolate Filling
by ThePervinErmin
Summary: Valentine's Day fic. Zelda rolls up her sleeves, meets Link's dad, and learns a little something about baking pies. One-shot.


**Hello, Happy Valentine's Day, I've been away. My apologies! *bow, bow* But here is my super lame Valentine's Day fanfic in which you shall learn to fear Pies. Enjoy.**

**And of course, disclaimers, Link and Zelda and Super Smash Bros Brawl are not miiiiiiiiiine. And neither is Valentine's Day, I'm very sure everyone already knows.**

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Once upon a time(in the Twilight Princess game at any rate) Link lived in a village. He lived with his jolly-happy father who everyone knew as Pies. Pies _loved _pies. Baking pies was his honest heart's delight. Meat pies, pot pies, qiches, custards, fruit tarts, apple pies, cherry pies, strawberry pies, peach pies, apricot pies, potato pies, plum pies, tomato pies, chocolate pies, vanilla pies, cheese pies, mushroom pies, cinnamon pies, nut pies, pizza pies, pudding pies, raspberry pies, orange pies, lemon pies, key lime pies, blueberry pies, banana pies, kiwi pies, deku nut pies, garlic pies, onion pies, blackberry pies, elderberry pies, mulberry pies, grape pies, olive pies, cranberry pies, pear pies, carrot pies, lettuce pies, cabbage pies, crab pies, fish pies, rice pies, buckwheat pies, bell pepper pies, cream pies, pomegranate pies, pickle pies, shrimp pies, strawberry-rhubarb pies, shepherd's pies, curry pies, raisin-noodle pies, rose pies, rosehip pies, marmalade pies, lentil pies, bean pies, maple pies, pumpkin pies, mint pies, ice cream-pudding pies, leek pies, broccoli pies, cauliflower pies, and so on. Safe to say, his pies were delicious, but Link was sick of them. In fact, the entire village was so sick of pies that when Pies wasn't baking them, he was out selling them at Castletown market.

Good fortune on Link's side, when he came to the Smash Mansion his pie baking assistant days were over and he hoped it would be the last he'd see of pies for a long long time. It wasn't meant as an insult to his happy pie-baking father with curly shoulder-length brown hair and a smile that was a mile long. Link had simply just had too many pies and I'm sure you understand how he felt after you finished reading that long list of pies. And it certainly had never helped that whenever Pies was putting pies in the oven to bake he'd always sing loudly, his voice filling the entire house, "GOODBYE, MY LOVE, GOODBYE! GOODBYE AND AU REVOIR! AS LONG AS YOU REMEMBER ME, I'LL NEVER BE TO FAR~!" and each time he'd take them out of the oven and ready them for sale he'd sing, "GOODBYE, MY _PIES, _GOODBYE! I ALWAYS WILL BE TRUE! SO HOLD ME IN YOUR DREAMS 'TIL I COME BACK, TOOOO YOUUUUUU~!" So by the end of that you can imagine just how tired poor Link was of the food after such experiences as he grew up. He did not want to see another pie for at least forty more years.

Zelda had known of Link's horror for pies for a very long time. Indeed, she could never quite feel what it was like for pies to be so horrible, but when she heard the story she at least came to understand that horror as much as one may from the outside. However, Zelda had a big problem. As a princess, she had never learned to cook. And it was almost Valentine's Day. She would need someone's help and asking Peach was out of the question. Much too embarrassing. She would soon blab about it to everyone and that would make Link find out. She wanted to surprise him and she refused to use chocolate that a store made. It had to be special! And who better to teach her than a pie expert?

She decided to take a little trip to Link's village with the excuse of visiting her own relatives. The smashers wished her well and Link told her he'd miss her. She shifted her bags and set off down the road, transforming into Sheik for easier travel.

When Zelda arrived, she transformed back and knocked politely at the door of the house that was vaguely singing, "_Goodbye, my love, goodbye! I always will be true.."_

»»««»»

She found that Pies was an odd, very happy, spry man with a strange accent who talked endlessly of pies and could never pronounce 'ed' at the end of past tense words. He would always say, "My pies, are finisht," or "Then you must use bakt potatoes."

Nevertheless, it was easy to get along with him, if one ignored his great strangeness that is, and found he was quite willing to teach her the way of the pie(one must remember that Pies was crazy about pies but everyone around him was sick of them and so it was a very delicious opportunity to find someone who really did want to learn.) In such a way the next four days passed and Zelda privately thought it very trying to hear so much about nothing but pies, yet to continue smiling politely, and she really began to understand Link a whole lot better. Days passed. The Day arrived and dawned. Zelda transformed into Sheik and made her way back to the Smash Mansion with her finalized gift for Link and her ears still ringing with Pies's odd song.

»»««»»

"Zelda!" Link shouted in delight and rushed to her. Upon reaching her, he threw his arms around her, squeezing her in a tight hug.

"Hello Link," she said. "I brought you something."

Link stared curiously as she held out a small, round container. "What's this?" He asked.

"I made it myself," said Zelda with some satisfaction at the look on his face. "Happy Valentine's Day."

Link opened the container with over exaggerated carefulness making Zelda laugh and swat at his shoulder. He stopped and stared.

"What is this stuff?" He said sniffing it.

"It's chocolate pie filling. Because you're sick of pies and it was all I could think of." She felt a little stupid for not having come up with something better to make.

"Oh good!" Said Link, full of enthusiasm. "I love pie filling." He gave her a bright smile. She couldn't help but smile. His smile was infectious.

"I love you."

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**Gah, past 12. Didn't quite finish on time. Oh well. I hope you enjoyed it despite the terrible way it was written and the over mentioning of pies. Bye bye, thanks for reading!**


End file.
